Butt, Boobs & Belly

June 16, 2011 Leave your thoughts

 

Let me start by saying that as of today, I’m over 13 weeks pregnant. When I started reading about the incredible body changes I was about to experience, I was intrigued by the fact that most literature says that first-time moms will not even show for 4 or 5 months. While I was not looking forward to the awkward “chunky” phase while I supposedly wouldn’t look pregnant, I was preparing to gain the suggested 2 to 4 pounds during 1st trimester.

 

All I can say is – the textbooks are bullshit! Every single mom I have “interviewed”, said the same thing, “Every woman is different. Every pregnancy is different.” I have been asked by many women if I’m having twins and/or if I’m sure I’m not already 6 months pregnant (I think I would know!).

 

At Week 7, there was one morning when I simply couldn’t hold in my stomach anymore. Tim calls it, ‘Sportin’ it’ when your gut is just hanging out for the world to see. I walked downstairs one morning and I have been Sportin’ It ever since. That was the day I switched to all of our relaxed-fit styles (thank you Free Me tops and Simply the Best collection!) [j, insert links to these pages]. [insert photo from week 12 #25?]

 

The body changes didn’t start or stop there. Within days of implantation (before I even knew I was pregnant), my boobs were a 1/2 size bigger. Yes, I went from an A to an “Almost B” cup almost immediately, and they have continued to grow at a steady pace ever since. One faster than the other of course – why are we never perfectly symmetrical?! For the first time in my life, I have cleavage! The cool thing is that they’re bigger. The not-so-cool thing is that they hurt. I actually have to wear a bra now. What the hell! [show cleavage photo here #67]

 

Next in line was my butt. I think it was jealous of my boobs. it really sticks out back there now. It has grown at least one inch. I think it started expanding even before my belly And it’s not a hard-bodied, gluteus-maximus-muscled butt. It’s a nice soft layer with a little texture. My theory is that my body is determined to create some nice, happy, homey fat stores to fuel the little bug, so as it evaluated where that fat could go, it decided that my butt would make a nice landing pad. I’m down with it; there’s no other way I can be. Tim has yet to start singing “Baby Got Back”; I’ll let you know when that changes. [show photo from week 13 #83 – I think this is not in the liist I sent, but has a good butt view]

 

But really – It’s all about the belly. I think it was Week 11 when it officially became a bump. That was the day I told my Skirt Sports team. I called a Company Meeting and handed out a carton of Kumquats. We then played Skirt Trivia. The question was, “What is a Kumquat?”. The team had to wait until all answers were read before replying, “A) a fruit, B) tarter than a tangerine, C) the size of a 10 week old fetus, D) the symbol I’m using to tell you I’m pregnant!” Since I occasionally do eccentric things, so the team wasn’t quite sure what to say, but the light bulb finally went off and then I stood up and wha-lah – they could clearly see that the BELLY BUMP WAS LARGE AND IN-CHARGE!!! [insert photo #72 – looks like I just stood up so good for this part]

 

So, here I am. Almost 14 weeks into the 40 they prescribe to grow another human being. I’ve put on about 10 pounds of “happiness” to prepare for this little critter. And so far, I’m embracing every minute of it.

 

 

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